Will Trump help NJ home prices?

From the Star Ledger:

The Trump Effect: What will the president mean for Bedminster real estate?

Residents of Bedminster are used to getting a blank look whenever they tell people the name of their hometown, followed by a quizzical, “Where?”

They usually answer the question by explaining it’s near Basking Ridge, or Bernardsville, or the Bridgewater mall.

With a very special neighbor expected to make frequent weekend visits this summer, however, that may change.

Less certain, though, is whether the local real estate market will experience a Trump Effect.

As Donald Trump quietly concluded his first getaway weekend in New Jersey since taking office, will his presence bring a certain cachet to the region, or be a turn-off to customers who worry about the commotion it might bring?

“We’re used to him, you know,” said Debra Groendyk, a real estate agent manning an open house of a property with 38 acres smack in the middle of horse country.

“We all know the different helicopters by now: ‘Oh, there’s the Trump helicopter. Oh, there’s the Forbes helicopter,'” she said.

While feelings about Trump still run high on both sides, so far they don’t seem to be rubbing off on town itself, several agents said.

“I’ve not had a single customer say, ‘Oh, Trump lives there! I don’t want to live there!,” said Groendyk. Nor has she had any customers express a preference for Bedminster-based solely on Trump’s use of his golf club there as a weekend retreat.

Any commotion was at a minimum this weekend. While there were planned protests on Saturday, just one person showed up briefly on Sunday. There were police cars parked at the front and side entrances of the golf club, but no road closures.

Instead, the traffic jams and parking headaches were a few miles away, at the fabulously popular rummage sale run by the Somerset County Visiting Nurses Association.

For Angela Olsen, a Scotch Plains residents exploring homes for sale in the Somerset Hills neck of the woods, the notion that the president could have any possible impact on that hunt gave her pause. She had made the association between the president’s visit and the town she was exploring just the day before, she said.

“Hopefully it won’t drive up prices for people who just want to live here for other reasons,” she said.

One change everyone agrees is likely: they’ll no longer have to give a long geography lesson whenever they mention Bedminster.

“He’s putting it on the map,” said Melton, “and maybe that’s good.”

This entry was posted in Housing Recovery, New Jersey Real Estate. Bookmark the permalink.

70 Responses to Will Trump help NJ home prices?

  1. Mike says:

    Good Morning New Jersey

  2. Chi says:

    The only good thing that came out of yesterday was a Twitter post asking when is Matt Harvey Bobbled!ldo Day?

  3. Ottoman says:

    “Residents of Bedminster are used to getting a blank look whenever they tell people the name of their hometown, followed by a quizzical, “Where?””

    Such fine reporting. This could be said about a huge number of NJ’s 566 towns. In fact, Bedminster is probably better known than half the bs towns in Bergen and Passaic Counties. Not only does it have an exit on 287 which expressly says “Bedminster” because its also the name of one of its villages which Routes 202 and 206 run through, it’s also home to the 5000 unit Hills development (a quarter of which have Basking Ridge zip codes so anyone searching houses in BR will already be searching in Bedminster too). BTW, you can walk from Bedminster village to the nurses Rummage Sale mentioned above and the Far Hills Race Meeting in less than 5 minutes so there’s plenty of commotion all year long right near the Welcome to Bedminster sign on 202.

    Confusing would be telling people you live in Bernards, which is the actual name of the town people think is Basking Ridge, because BR is the zip code and one of the villages. And its different than Bernardsville. There are no exits for Bernards on 287 or 78 even though both go right through it or past it.

    As for the required “long geography lesson”: Bedminster is where 287 and 78 cross. Done.

  4. chicagofinance says:
  5. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    Trump doesn’t need to help [Wayne] NJ home price. Pumpking has those covered.

  6. Phoenix says:

    Well, at least they did not eliminate the Arithmetic.

    Parsippany eliminating reading and writing program

    http://www.dailyrecord.com/story/news/local/morris-county/2017/05/06/parsippany-eliminating-reading-and-writing-program-14-teachers/311703001/

  7. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    I was able to watch all of Face the Nation just during commercial breaks in *extra* innings of last night’s Yankees game.

  8. The Great Pumpkin says:

    Like clockwork, you either see the writing on the wall or you don’t.

    “A growing labor shortage in the commercial real-estate industry is driving up the costs of some projects and could complicate lawmakers’ plans for a $1 trillion infrastructure-spending program, contractors say.
    “Ever since we came out of the great recession, many folks in our industry have been saying: it’s coming, it’s coming, it’s coming,” said George Nash Jr., director of preconstruction for Branch and Associates, a Roanoke, Va., contractor. “Today the problem is there.”
    Construction businesses, excluding those building single-family homes, employed close to 4.2 million workers in April, up 3,000 from March, according to an analysis by the Associated Builders and Contractors, a trade group. That was the highest employment level since November 2008, though still below the record 4.4 million workers employed in the nonresidential construction segment in February 2008, the analysis said.
    Labor pressures are increasing in the construction industry as hiring overall accelerates across the U.S. economy. On Friday, the Labor Department reported that nonfarm payrolls rose by a seasonally adjusted 211,000 in April and the unemployment rate fell to 4.4%, the lowest level in almost a decade.
    Among the hot pockets of construction activity are office development in New York and condominium and rental-housing projects in downtown Los Angeles, Boston and Miami. Big infrastructure projects include the modernization of Chicago’s O’Hare International Airport and a tunnel in Seattle that will replace a viaduct vulnerable to earthquakes.
    Contractors throughout the country said that as the workload grows, they are beginning to see shortages of electricians, carpenters and other subcontractor laborers.
    When they bid out jobs two years ago, several contractors said, two or three subcontractors would typically respond for each part of the project. Today they are running into situations in which there is only one bid, making it harder to hold down costs, they said.
    Subcontractors said they also are feeling the pinch. Gaylor Electric Inc. of Indianapolis has opted against bidding on some jobs “because we didn’t have the people,” said Chuck Goodrich, the company’s president.
    Gaylor has added 70 employees in the last two months but still has about 200 empty positions, Mr. Goodrich said. “The economy is growing, and construction jobs need to be filled,” he said.”

    https://apple.news/A_nLovUiZSc681ihcJjIKyQ

  9. Phoenix says:

    Pumps,
    Many contractors would rather take on smaller projects that they know they will be compensated well vs getting into a bidding war and having to deal with the larger projects where they are having a harder time getting paid.

  10. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    Remember the last time Pumpking said he wasn’t going to post anymore? I think he lasted about 4 days. This time he didn’t even last 4 hours.

  11. leftwing says:

    Questions to brokers on here re: the property I intend to sell.

    I will MLS it. I still want to offer an incentive to buyers agents.

    Is it better to offer a straight up 5% commission to the buyer’s agent or should I do 2.5% plus a bonus (say $15k)?
    Which is more attractive to salespeople?
    In the bonus case, would the bonus be kept by the salesperson or does it go through their split with their brokerage?

    Thanks in advance.

  12. The Great Pumpkin says:

    Maybe my call of millennials moving to the suburbs is nothing more than a dream. The pumpkin strikes again. Dead on with my call that suburbs are not dead.

    From Franklin Lakes to Palisades Park and from Secaucus to Wayne, numerous residential real estate projects are in various stages of development all over North Jersey, a trend led by the rise of multi-family housing — specifically, higher-end apartment rentals.

    “Go back 20 years ago, and it was single-family units that were the real growth sector,” said James Hughes, the dean of Rutgers University’s Edward J. Bloustein School of Planning and Public Policy. “But there is now a national phenomenon of multi-family housing. The reason is that millennials are a rental housing generation. They got late starts to their careers due to the recession, they have large student loans, and they are having a good time being single.”

    And there is another large group of potential buyers and renters for town homes, condos, and apartments: baby boomers.

    “We call them the ‘bookends’ — the millennials on one end and the graying baby boomers on the other,” said Thomas Bruinooge, an attorney who has been involved in Meadowlands-area real estate deals for a half-century. “Some of them find they don’t need a 3,000-square-foot house as they grow older, and they want convenient locations.”

    Proximity to Manhattan and mass transit has fueled an ongoing boom in residential development in Hudson County. Jersey City is leading the way with the four largest multi-family construction projects in the Bergen-Passaic-Hudson-Essex region, according to the Dodge Data & Analytics real estate research firm. Those four projects alone are valued at more than $900 million and accounted for about one-third of the 88 percent rise in the value of residential construction startups in those four counties last year.

    The largest Bergen County project on the list is Building 2 of The Modern apartments in Fort Lee, valued at $120 million.

    “What killed the condo product essentially is that the decline in housing prices in New Jersey since the great recession has made condos unprofitable to build unless you are very close to Manhattan,” said Jeffrey Otteau, president of The Otteau Group real estate research firm, which has offices in Matawan, New York and Philadelphia.

    Carl Goldberg, one of the state’s leading real estate developers for the past several decades, said northern Bergen County “is undergoing a seismic shift in land use patterns.”

    One reason is that there are so many large tracts of land, including sprawling office parks built in the 1980s and 1990s, that have turned into “stranded assets,” Goldberg said, as the lack of amenities within walking distance repels so many of the millennials that companies want to hire. Meanwhile, local officials are scrambling to raise more tax revenue — and due to a recent state Supreme Court decision, “there is an affordable-housing obligation in many of these towns that will now be coming due,” Goldberg said.

    http://www.northjersey.com/story/news/business/2017/04/13/north-jersey-becoming-apartment-haven/99532186/

  13. Blue Ribbon Teacher says:

    Not only does it have an exit on 287 which expressly says “Bedminster” because its also the name of one of its villages which Routes 202 and 206 run through, it’s also home to the 5000 unit Hills development (a quarter of which have Basking Ridge zip codes so anyone searching houses in BR will already be searching in Bedminster too).

    I spent a lot of time in the Starbucks at Bedminster. Never actually realized I was in Bedminster until about 3 years into it.

  14. Steamy Cankles Foundation says:

    Phoenix,

    I can only imagine the waste that was occurring there that there were reading courses in middle school and 10 office aides. If you can’t read by 6th grade, something is terribly wrong.

  15. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    A zillion years ago when I was a realtor in NNJ, the law precluded specific deals like this, but that was way before buyer’s agents even existed, so, unlike Pumpking on matters of real estate, I stipulate that I have no knowledge of present conditions.

    Is it better to offer a straight up 5% commission to the buyer’s agent or should I do 2.5% plus a bonus (say $15k)?
    Which is more attractive to salespeople?

  16. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    Maybe an idea for re-purposing empty parking lots of abandoned NJ office parks?

    http://www.marketwatch.com/story/in-the-future-you-might-work-in-an-inflatable-office-2016-11-29

  17. Comrade Nom Deplorable, stealing Ottoman's crayons says:

    CNN referred to Bedminster as “fox hunting country.”

    I live in fox hunting country. Bedminster would make lousy fox hunting country as there’s no way to ride cross-country. In fact, I’m not even sure they have fox there.

  18. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    Tiger has been just a mess since Elin stopped kissing his balls and making his putter stand up.

    http://www.golf.com/tour-news/2017/05/07/jack-nicklaus-feels-sadness-tiger-wake-latest-back-surgery

  19. Comrade Nom Deplorable, stealing Ottoman's crayons says:

    ” Blue Ribbon Teacher says:
    May 8, 2017 at 11:41 am

    I spent a lot of time in the Starbucks at Bedminster.”

    That’s a regular stop for me on my way up or back from Mass. I’ve probably seen you in there

  20. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    They might be confusing Bedminster with Peapack-Gladstone right next door. If you have the right hunting implements, you can probably finds some foxes laying out at the pool behind their mansions while their husbands spend 80+ hours a week in NY paying for both(mansion and fox).

    CNN referred to Bedminster as “fox hunting country.”

  21. Comrade Nom Deplorable, stealing Ottoman's crayons says:

    Expat,

    Yes, the only fox-hunting done in NJ is done by JJ types.

  22. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    LOL. Check out the logo of Peapack-Gladstone bank (not to mention their fox hunt pics in their slide show).

    https://www.pgbank.com/

    BTW, if you hunt on my sister’s cul de sac you won’t find any foxes. Cougars yes, foxes no;-)

  23. Comrade Nom Deplorable, stealing Ottoman's crayons says:

    I have an actual fox skulk or two living in my neighborhood. There’s a large den complex in my neighbor’s yard, feet from my property line. I think there is another further into his property.

    I’ve noticed that as the fox population increased, I am no longer finding mice in my house. :-)

    No hunting in my neighborhood but when I was renting a nompound 4 years ago, the Radnor Hunt went thundering through my fields. I had just moved from NJ and it surprised the hell out of me.

  24. Comrade Nom Deplorable, stealing Ottoman's crayons says:

    expat

    “LOL. Check out the logo of Peapack-Gladstone bank (not to mention their fox hunt pics in their slide show).”

    Yep, that looks like a fox hunt. Not a hunter-jumper run as the horses are too grouped.

  25. Comrade Nom Deplorable, stealing Ottoman's crayons says:

    Was at this yesterday. Weather sucked. They did have a fox hunt on the course as a prelim. event. Had four Moscow Mules before the racing even started.

    http://www.winterthur.org/?p=1142

  26. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    Nom – My MIL lives on a trendy cul de sac in Blairstown completely backed by acres of woods. Turkey and deer are seen almost daily, bears occasionally, and fox every now and then. Red tail hawks are farily common as well. Come to think of it, she’s never had a rodent problem;-)

    I’ve noticed that as the fox population increased, I am no longer finding mice in my house. :-)

  27. Comrade Nom Deplorable, stealing Ottoman's crayons says:

    Expat,

    I lived down the road from this event, also put on by Radnor Hunt. But I have yet to go to it.

    http://www.southernchestercountyweeklies.com/general-news/20170402/brandywine-hills-point-to-point-delights-with-races-food-and-activities

  28. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    That sounds like either the beginning or the end of a JJ story;-)

    Had four Moscow Mules before the racing even started.

  29. Comrade Nom Deplorable, stealing Ottoman's crayons says:

    Expat

    “Nom – My MIL lives on a trendy cul de sac in Blairstown completely backed by acres of woods. Turkey and deer are seen almost daily, bears occasionally, and fox every now and then. Red tail hawks are farily common as well. Come to think of it, she’s never had a rodent problem;-)”

    We also have the hawks and some falcons too, I think. I’ve seen the hawks sizing up my Boston Terrier from time to time but they leave him alone. Only one bear sighting that I am aware of, quite recently I’m told. But yeah, between the foxes and the hawks, I haven’t learned of a mouse in the house in several months.

    Deer treat my yard like a f*&ing salad bar.

  30. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    Wouldn’t it be great if clot came back and did a land-based JJ story? This time the high heels might get caught in the stirrups instead of the oarlocks?

  31. Comrade Nom Deplorable, stealing Ottoman's crayons says:

    Expat

    “That sounds like either the beginning or the end of a JJ story;-)”

    Nope, not to be confused with donkey punches.

  32. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    Deer are my MIL’s problem too. Having lived on the very Western edge of Boston, and now the very Southwestern edge (near the Dedham line), I’m surprised what we see. Turkeys are commonplace by nearly the dozen, coyotes rule the night, and wolves do make small pets disappear. I was surprised to see a single large Turkey jump over my back fence the other day. I don’t think I’ve ever seen just one, it seems like it has always been 4-14. The scariest wildlife I’ve ever seen though is gigantic snapping turles (40 lbs?) laying eggs between a bikepath and the Charles River in late May or early June. They look like dinosaurs and have have claws that are the size of my hands and I think I have Trump beat on size;-)

    I’ve also seen a blonde wolf on a bike path in Newton near the Charles on a rainy day. He was just sitting in the center of a pedestrian/bike bridge across the Charles, gazing downstream and I mistook him for a golden retriever that was yards ahead of his master as I approached him on my bike. He turned tail and ran away from me, “tail” being the operative word. His tail was thick, straight, and pointed down. He looked like he was 60-80 pounds and fresh back from the groomer, but it was no dog. For some reason I was still sizing up what he was when he did another 180 and disappeared into thick brush. As you might know Nom, we have vast network of trails and paths adjacent to the Charles River, but the majority of them come up to street level at automobile bridge crossings. My theory is that the wolves have dens under the automobile bridges where no humans go and at night (or in inclement weather) they can travel tens of miles on either side of the Charles and hardly ever be noticed. I should go out some day after a new snow and see if I can find tracks that support my theory.

    Deer treat my yard like a f*&ing salad bar.

  33. The Great Pumpkin says:

    You forgot to mention this line in that article mocking me.

    “He added that while he believes many millennials will eventually buy residences, it likely will be later — and that trend could continue for years.”

  34. The Great Pumpkin says:

    First, any educated millennial will quickly do the math and choose to own as opposed to rent. It’s not rocket science to understand how much money you save owning as opposed to renting. When they start seeing their friends and family who bought, making nice appreciation, they will all follow like f’ing lemmings. They only chose to rent because they are single and unmarried. They can’t afford to buy on their f’ing own. Takes two incomes. Once they are married and have a kid or two, they will want to own their own place. Not everyone wants to live their whole life in a townhouse or condo, or some high rise luxury apartment building. Give me a break with this bs already. You think old people are going to pay hoa fees….f that.

  35. 3b says:

    I thought he left??

  36. The Great Pumpkin says:

    And you know who is pushing all these apartment dwellings on places like Wayne? F’ing dirtbag developers. They don’t care about long term. They just care about now. Since right now, the only profitable thing they can build is large rental units, they are trying to sneak this into places like Wayne. Get the f’ck out of here. That’s how you destroy towns like Wayne. Bring in loads of rental units that will be disguised as luxury in the short term, but when those renters go to buy, there will only be poor people looking to rent in 5-7 years. Save me the bs.

  37. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    When I think of Bedminster, I think of a couple things:

    My Mom used to work at the big AT&T campus on “AT&T Way”. I guess some credit union has the buildings now?

    Also, I used to always seem to have the last exam at Rutgers, which was crap. I can even remember the dates, December 21st, and May 15th. If you had the last exam that meant you had to be already moved out of your dorm, there were virtually no parties, everyone was already home or on their way home. It sucked. I didn’t really have a car on campus my first few years, but my parents would lend me a car for that last week to pack all of my stuff into and take that sad, solo ride up 287 back to Morris County. One of those December 21sts I was heading North on 287 in the rain and just as I started climbing that hill North of 202 it iced up as I ascended that hill where the North and Southbound lanes are separated by both elevation and woods. My car slid down the embankment (it looks like there is guardrail the whole length of the hill to prevent this now) towards woods, but I didn’t hit anything. Somehow, I was able to get my parents’ ’72 Vega up the icy grass (with bias ply non-radial tires! Goodyear “Silvertowns” IIRC) and steep slope by attacking it at a very shallow angle over a long distance up the hill. I’m sure I probably bought a 6 pack of Michelob at a bar when I got close to home?

  38. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    His handle should be Herpes.
    I thought he left??

  39. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    Better yet, Polish Herpes, the worst venereal disease ever. It threatens to go away, but it never does.

  40. Steamy Cankles Foundation says:

    It’s really easy to spread too. Just lick a pickle and put it back in the jar.

  41. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    LOL!!

    BTW, a few months ago I accidentally wandered down the Kosher aisle at our local supermarket. I spotted these pickles by company called “Kühne”. Not cheap, either. $5.99 for a jar of “barrel pickles”. I figures, “What the hell? I probably won’t be down this aisle again.” We’ve been buying them ever since. Thinly sliced, they go great on burgers, diced they are better than any relish, and they’re pretty damned good on their own. Surprisingly, they aren’t even any cheaper at Amazon:

    https://www.amazon.com/Kuhne-Garlic-Barrel-Pickles-Ounce/dp/B0039BSG9E

  42. The Great Pumpkin says:

    Riddle me this….if renting is so great, and financially beneficial, why does almost every intelligent individual with money own? Cause they are idiots? If you have to rent for whatever reason it be, not bashing you. If you have a choice between renting and owning, and you choose to rent…..then you must like flushing money down the drain.

  43. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    Pumps is scabbing over.

  44. jcer says:

    Pumps people own because with a rental you don’t control your destiny, if you don’t like something about your apartment or rental home you are at the mercy of a landlord, even if you want to pay to renovate. People with money own because they can, and it is important for their lifestyle, not to make money, but because they need a place to live and want it to be comfortable. A home is an asset but it is not really an investment, there is little rationality in a home purchase it is largely emotional. All of the bears on this site pretty much own homes.

  45. The Great Pumpkin says:

    Renting, almost every time, is like throwing money out the window. In ten years, you pretty much paid off the house for the landlord. Lifetime of renting and how much money did you put in someone else’s pocket. How many houses did you pay for with nothing to show for it? Renting is for suckers…plain and simple. You only rent at the top of a bubble. Only time it makes any sense.

    So yes, it becomes an investment when it puts money in my pocket instead of some landlords.

  46. jcer says:

    Pumpkin, I’m now a landlord, what about property taxes, maintenance, vacancy, tenant damage, non-payment of rent. Based on my original purchase price(my invested dollars), 2.5% 15 year mortgage, maintenance costs and rent roll, I’m looking at a leveraged return of 6.5% if there are no major catastrophes, all principal payback(zero cashflow) until either rents go up or the mortgage is paid off in year 11. Which is not a great return for a zero cashflow but I’ll get to keep the appreciation and eliminate the transaction costs of selling, if I didn’t think it was a good market and didn’t have the intention of taking the property back for personal use, I’d sell.

  47. No One says:

    The best pickles I can find in a store is “Bubbies” pickles. They are real fermented pickles. Most pickles are created by soaking in vinegar. Compare and see.

  48. No One says:

    Renting leaves dramatically more flexibility for people to relocate, change jobs, etc. Renting makes a lot of sense in many situations.
    Anyway, given how high NJ property taxes are, every “owner” is renting their house from their town.

  49. Blue Ribbon Teacher says:

    Renting, almost every time, is like throwing money out the window. In ten years, you pretty much paid off the house for the landlord. Lifetime of renting and how much money did you put in someone else’s pocket. How many houses did you pay for with nothing to show for it? Renting is for suckers…plain and simple. You only rent at the top of a bubble. Only time it makes any sense.

    So yes, it becomes an investment when it puts money in my pocket instead of some landlords.

    Renting provides a valuable mechanism to accumulate cash. The only reason I was able to get a house as large as I did because I rented for 10 years. Most people in the rent vs. buy argument assume you will go and rent a 4 BR home in Montclair. When you are in your twenties without kids, you can rent a 1 BR in Piscataway and bank an extra $10 to 12k a year.

  50. Blue Ribbon Teacher says:

    A few years back, 4 cucumber plants I had produced over 200 cucumbers. I made at least 20 large jars of pickles. I grow the garlic, dill, and peppers I use in them as well.

  51. chicagofinance says:

    glug glug dickweed…..

    The Great Pumpkin says:
    May 8, 2017 at 3:34 pm
    Riddle me this….if renting is so great, and financially beneficial, why does almost every intelligent individual with money own? Cause they are idiots? If you have to rent for whatever reason it be, not bashing you. If you have a choice between renting and owning, and you choose to rent…..then you must like flushing money down the drain.

  52. chicagofinance says:

    you can suck me

    The Great Pumpkin says:
    May 8, 2017 at 4:20 pm
    Renting is for suckers…plain and simple. You only rent at the top of a bubble.

  53. chicagofinance says:

    The level of this analysis is essentially 1 + 1 = 2.

    Thanks so much for your insights!

    The Great Pumpkin says:
    May 8, 2017 at 2:50 pm
    First, any educated millennial will quickly do the math and choose to own as opposed to rent. It’s not rocket science to understand how much money you save owning as opposed to renting. When they start seeing their friends and family who bought, making nice appreciation, they will all follow like f’ing lemmings. They only chose to rent because they are single and unmarried. They can’t afford to buy on their f’ing own. Takes two incomes. Once they are married and have a kid or two, they will want to own their own place. Not everyone wants to live their whole life in a townhouse or condo, or some high rise luxury apartment building. Give me a break with this bs already. You think old people are going to pay hoa fees….f that.

  54. Grab them by the puzzy says:

    @KeithOlbermann

    Coming up on #TheResistanceGQ:
    Sally Yates’ heroism reveals Trump’s treason.

    He covered up for the Russian stooge,
    fired the loyal American

  55. chicagofinance says:

    Bill worked in a pickle factory. He had been employed there for a number of years when he came home one day to confess to his wife that he had a terrible compulsion. He had an urge to stick his peni$ into the pickle slicer. His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk about it, but Bill indicated that he’d be too embarrassed. He vowed to overcome the compulsion on his own. One day a few weeks later, Bill came home absolutely ashen. His wife could see at once that something was seriously wrong. “What’s wrong, Bill?” she asked. “Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my peni$ into the pickle slicer?” “Oh, Bill, you didn’t.” “Yes, I did.” “My God, Bill, what happened?” “I got fired.” “No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?” “Oh…she got fired too.”

    The Original NJ ExPat says:
    May 8, 2017 at 3:27 pm
    LOL!!

    BTW, a few months ago I accidentally wandered down the Kosher aisle at our local supermarket. I spotted these pickles by company called “Kühne”. Not cheap, either. $5.99 for a jar of “barrel pickles”. I figures, “What the hell? I probably won’t be down this aisle again.” We’ve been buying them ever since. Thinly sliced, they go great on burgers, diced they are better than any relish, and they’re pretty damned good on their own. Surprisingly, they aren’t even any cheaper at Amazon:

  56. 3b says:

    Chi. Is he trying to convince me, you, or himself?

  57. The Original NJ ExPat says:

    LOL!!!!!!!!!

    “Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my peni$ into the pickle slicer?” “Oh, Bill, you didn’t.” “Yes, I did.” “My God, Bill, what happened?” “I got fired.” “No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?” “Oh…she got fired too.”

  58. The Great Pickle Slicer says:

    I don’t know why anyone would live on a safe street in a nice neighborhood when you could buy a house on a drag strip where people whiz by at 5o to 70 mph all day. It comes down to you are a dope for protecting your kids by renting when you could just compromise and suck carbon monoxide all day long and hope more than a couple of your stupid kids live to adulthood. Anybody who rents in a quiet neighborhood is just throwing away money. If you can’t afford to raise your kids in a shack you will own after you pay taxes and interest for 30, 40, or 50 years, I’m not bashing you, but anybody who has a choice between turning a kid or two into roadkill versus renting and not paying sky-high taxes…well you know that anybody can f.uck a woman and have more kids, but rent is money that is thrown away for ever. Stupid, low IQ kids practically grow out of the ground.

  59. Lurks McGee says:

    As one of the landlords pointed out, you’re probably paying property tax in one way or another. You can’t have zero carry cost without that. Funny enough, its deductible for the owner (unless that crappy tax reform is pushed)

  60. The Great Pumpkin says:

    Couldn’t have said it any better myself. Perfect read for some on this blog.

    “The Absolute Insanity of Not Buying a Home When You’re Young
    by tyler tervooren
    Fellow Riskologist,

    If you’re young—under 40 or so—and have been heeding all the personal finance advice spewing forth from some of the most popular columnists and bloggers over the last few years about how owning a home doesn’t make financial sense anymore, I’m afraid you’ve been duped.

    Absolutely, positively, undeniably duped.

    Buying a house—especially when you’re younger—is still an incredibly smart decision financial or otherwise. I’m about to explain why, but let me start by saying I do not own a home, so there is no hidden bias in the argument I’m about to make.

    Read on to learn why all the smart financial bloggers who tell you it’s better to rent than buy are completely wrong. Hint: It’s in the numbers.”

    https://www.riskology.co/rent-vs-buy-insanity/

  61. The Great Pumpkin says:

    It’s all a cycle! Come on, sing it with me….it’s all a cycle!

    “Four years ago, all the personal finance bloggers and television celebrities reminded us: “We’re in a bubble, and a bubble does not change the rules of money. Don’t spend too much on a house.”

    Yet, now, as we watch prices continue to decline, the same talking heads start to disregard their own advice. They start to question if buying a house is a good idea at all. Maybe we’ve all been duped, and owning a home is just asking for financial ruin.

    Articles start to pop up all over the Internet on well-respected sites like Forbes, Time, NYT, and many others with headlines like “Why I Never Want to Own a Home Again.”

    They start to argue that houses are poor investments and that you can earn more elsewhere. They argue that buying ties you down and kills your freedom. Or that maintenance costs are too much to bear—it’s better to rent so the landlord has to pay for it. They make up all kinds of other arguments that sound good in the moment, but are completely ridiculous.”

  62. The Great Pumpkin says:

    Lesson here….when renting is “the cool kid move”….buy. When buying is the “cool kid move”….sell and rent. Rinse, wash, repeat! Best advice someone will ever give you.

  63. 3b says:

    Bizarre! Simply bizarre!

  64. STEAMturd says:

    You know what Moana?

    This whole Russian thing is complete BS. Just like the birther movement was. Fortunately, Obama finally revealed his birth certificate and put an end to the unhinged on the the right. I’m afraid we going to have to listen to the unhinged on the left for the next 8 years since there’s nothing to reveal. You would think the girls that peed on the Orange One would have come forward to TMZ by now. No?

  65. Comrade Nom Deplume, The GOAT says:

    Puzzy, like Herr Goebbelmann, gets his facts wrong and conflated two unrelated events.

  66. Comrade Nom Deplume, The GOAT says:

    I’m researching Mass. firearms laws for a friend who lives part time on the Cape and wants to keep a gun there. . The inanities in the MGL are beyond belief. I came across this restriction that many of you might be violating at your local gun range:

    “Such club shall not permit shooting at targets that depict human figures, human effigies, human silhouettes or any human images thereof…”

    SMMFH. Even Jersey isn’t this bad.

  67. Comrade Nom Deplume, The GOAT says:

    Read another piece on the queer SJWs going after ChikfilA

    I really do thank them for that. I had never been to one before then. If they hadn’t created such a firestorm, I might never have discovered how good Chick-fil-A really is.

Comments are closed.